Update (:

I can't honestly think about how i feel...I'm not sure
Today was amazing! But he wasn't here today, he is in Kentucky. I can't say i miss him but then again i do. I'm doing my best to let him live his life and me live mine, he was such a huge part of me. Crazy right?
Well i got asked out today, i said no though. He is a player, his name is Lane. I just didn't want to get my heart broken again. Single is something i am starting to get used too, i kinda like it. I'm not for sure how to go on about things though, i know i love him. I see myself with him while i grow old, but that scares me, i think? But it's so hard to trust him, i hate that. I hate not knowing, but these feelings are crazy. I feel like im not right. I feel like something is wrong with me, but everyone i say that too tells mr different, and i don't know why. I want him to be a part of who i am but i just don't know....here i go again, just rambling on about stupid crap that i doubt anyone cares for, how silly is that? I am writing knowing people don't care, yet i do it anyway? So ironic.
Things are different though, i feel different. i turned 16 on the 12th, and i already feel a big change, so not cool.
Christian calls me every night, even though we aren't together, i guess it's just good to know he is ok. Wow, i am terrible. Still letting him call me. I should just tell him to leave me alone, that i want nothing to do with him...but im not that good of a liar.
Well i got tons of homework and other things to do, just not in the mood.
Crazy though, how this boy, whom i have only known for 2weeks claims to be in love with me. So stupid. I can not stand that..."oh i have only known you for like 2weeks yet i am sooooooooo in love with you" Like really? get over yourself kidd.
I am sorry i think im ADHD. i keep coming and going from one subject to another then back again, i am silly.
Anyway that's just an update i guess, things are different now days. Just pushing through!
Well i got things to do, later everyone!